The mother’s love is considered to be self-evident feeling, but objectively it is not. Children are not the ideal children of our imagination. As well as the mothers don’t look like…
with those that describe the poems.
The myth of motherhood -like every myth – is simplified and simplified. All of us have experienced the breaking down of this myth in our childhood, but growing up all we want to prove that we verify as parents. It looks like there’s a collective belief that when a woman becomes a mother is transformed into a holy creature. Those who have been in the process of working therapeutically with themselves, they know that the kind and quality of love we received as children, this is what we can offer as parents.
The relationship with the kid is magic. The adult man, seemingly, has the ability to create the ideal relationship, to mold the perfect man, as he has in mind. This, however, the model very often in the 24-hour collides with the real feelings, which spring up from where you don’t expect, and which remain unacknowledged and well-hidden.
Trying parents to make what they imagine very often-depending on the nature of the work. Achieve exactly the image and fool the people around and themselves. The only one not fooled is the child, which remains the only reliable witness to the truth of the emotions of each family.
It can be abused emotionally for a child to be forced to fit the image they have of the parents, to meet their expectations, to become what they want. However, there will always be something that sooner or later it will appear as weakness, disease, aggression, apathy, and he will not be able to explain. The abuse of children is not only the extreme stories that come out in the news. Happens every day by unsuspecting parents. It happens with a blank stare, with a ÎµÏ€Î¹Ï„Î¹Î¼Î·Ï„Î¹ÎºÎ® look, with insulting words, with anger that is trapped in a closed mouth. It happens when parents focus on the achievements and not in the child itself, to the existence of.
It happens, not why it does or does not make a parent is so awesome, but because the baby is so fragile and dependent for survival from them. It’s made so that it perceives the center of his being, every vibration that feels the creature that gives it life.
I don’t have no mother to think that they can take care of a baby mechanical, without impact. The baby doesn’t meet a gaze to the staring, he feels he is in mortal danger. The imprint of the emotional lack of, or the emotional distress of the mother is indelible in the soul and in the human body.
But, because the mothers is not as available as it needs to be for the needs of the child?
Why mothers and fathers before all people. People who have travelled a distance in their life, they may have wounds open, hidden secrets, repressed feelings and, in each case, childhood trauma that is now activated. The kid comes in our lives and brings us face to face with the past. We have two options: you deal with it or pass it unchanged. This is exactly the opportunity that gives you the Î³Î¿Î½ÎµÏŠÎºÏŒÏ„Î·Ï„Î±. Your mirrors of the wounds, the distortions, the gaps. You can always Î±Ï€Î¿ÏƒÏ„ÏÎÏˆÎµÎ¹Ï‚ the look but not without a price.
Parents who care, the most important thing they can do to protect their children from themselves, is to take care of themselves. Only in this way will allow their love to manifest effortlessly and beneficially.