Eric Clapton: The death of his 4-year-old son and the heartbreaking ballad “Tears in Heaven”

One of the most devastating moments in the life of the famous musician was undoubtedly the tragic death of his 4-year-old, Connor, in 1991. On March 20, 1991, the tragedy hit Eric Clapton when his son, the fruit of his relationship with Italian actress Laurie Del Santo, fell out of the 53rd floor window of an apartment building in New York City. It’s one of those dramas of life no one wants to imagine or experience. The loss of his beloved son marked Clapton’s life and career. The English virtuoso guitarist and composer expressed his pain through his music and released the song “Tears in Heaven”, which he wrote along with Will Jennings (Will Jennings), as a tribute to his son. In 2004 Rolling Stone magazine included “Tears in Heaven” on the list of the 500 best songs of all time. The song reflected the great rocker’s grief but also the longing to be reunited with his son who left so indignantly. The fall of 4-year-old Connor from the 53rd floor When Eric Clapton first met the Italian actress and later mother of his child, Laurie Del Santo, in 1985 in Milan, she did not recognize him. The young Italian woman had left her village outside Verona to pursue a career in television and modeling. “I didn’t want to get involved with a celebrity, interested in one-night adventures, and never see him again. I was looking for a serious relationship with a man with whom I could have a child,” she will say. At first she kept her distance, but with his perseverance Eric Clapton succeeded in becoming a couple. It was the time when Clapton separated from Patty Boyd, the iconic “Layla” of the famous song and ex-wife of George Harrison of the Beatles and with which he had nine years in a relationship. The discussion about having a child took place several months after they met. Eric and Laurie were excited about the idea of a baby. They made the decision to have a family in September and in December Laurie was pregnant. “I was so happy, I couldn’t believe it, but Eric was not happy at all and lost in his dark mood when I told him,” Laurie describes. “For him it was difficult, he dislikes changes and wants to have a simple and organized life (…) the baby took him completely out of line. But I knew he wanted it too much.” Eric Clapton took six months to get used to the idea of becoming a father. He could not get used to all this change, that he would come second and the needs this little creature had would come first. Lori decided to disappear. She didn’t want anything from him. When the baby was born, in August 1986, Clapton left on vacation but when he returned all three began living together, as a family. He will say that for the sake of the child he stopped drinking. “When I was born I was drinking and it was that main reason why I returned to therapy, because I really love this boy,” Clapton said. The tragedy is that the day he realized what it meant to be a father and what his son meant to him, it was the day before the tragic accident that would separate once and for all father and son. The day before Connor’s death, on March 20, 1991, was one of the happiest of their common lives. “It was a special day. We had come to New York to spend time with Eric, he had taken him to the circus, they had had a great time. When they came back, Eric told me: “Now I understand what it means to have a child, to be a father.” He was so happy” Laurie had told. According to police, little Connor escaped for fractions of a second from his nanny’s surveillance, climbed onto the window bed and a small opening left by the cleaning lady fell into the vacuum. The window was on the 53rd floor. Lori Del Santo was in New York for a few days on business. Clapton was staying at a nearby hotel and was preparing to pick up Connor to spend the day together at the Central Park Zoo. Clapton arrived five minutes later, he didn’t realize what had happened. Upon entering the apartment, he heard Laurie screaming “He’s dead!”. Clapton collapsed, he couldn’t believe it. The unfortunate boy’s funeral took place at the church in the village of Clapton in Ripley, Surrey. “Tears in Heaven” – A father’s fatality Clapton did not speak of the tragic incident for years. But he found the way to manage his unbearable grief through his music. And so was born the song “Tears in Heaven”, written about his son and what happened. Clapton after the tragic loss of his son abstained from all his professional activity for the rest of the time. With the help of songwriter Will Jennings he wrote “Tears in Heaven”, as a tribute to the wrongful Connor. The song was released in singles on January 17, 1992. He was originally included in the soundtrack of the police film “Rush” and then in his masterpiece “Unplugged”. Eric had thought of the first verse after Connor’s death. “Would you know my name if I saw you in heaven? » ( Would you know my name, if I saw you in heaven?) “Eric and I were writing music for the Rush film, at one point he told me he wanted to write a song about his son,” Jennings relates. Producer of the film Lily Zanuk persuaded Clapton to use the piece in the film. The song won three Grammys in 1993 while Clapton was the same time nominated for nine awards and won the six. On his 2003 tour Eric Clapton had discovered that he could no longer tell his concerts the songs “Tears in Heaven” and “My father’s eyes”. The second had written it for his father who never knew after he died of leukemia in 1985 but also for Connor’s son. “I didn’t feel the loss anymore, which was an integral part of their interpretation. To do that I have to reconnect with the feelings I felt when I wrote those songs. They’re kind of lost, and I don’t want them to come back. Maybe I’ll say it again from another perspective.” “This song was not written for the audience. I only did it so I wouldn’t go crazy,” wrote Eric Clapton in autobiography in 2007.